"The soul mate guy?" He had asked.

Brooke had looked at him in surprise. It showed him what he needed
to see. She and Sam were sharing some kind of symbosis. He still
wasn’t sure exactly what was going on, but something tickled his
brain and he hadn’t liked the feeling. All he could think was
that
somehow Sam was taking Brooke away from him, which was crazy. How
could a friend take a girl away from her boyfriend. Then it had
clicked, Sam still felt something for him and Brooke felt bad about
it.

Still, there was a key piece of the whole mess missing. Now he was
the one sinking into his own thoughts. The server brought them their
entrees. Brooke hadn’t gotten anything big. She had been doing so
well lately. Eating a normal amount and she was at a very healthy
weight considering where she had been in the past. Now, she resorted
to her old habits of under eating, only ordering a salad and a small
bowl of soup. The only thing completely gone from the salad was the
cucumbers and she had chosen not to put dressing on it at all.
Crackers came with the soup but she passed them to him. He took them
slowly taking this chance. Her fingers grazed his palm and he held
them there. When she tried to pull her hand back he had held on,
crushing the crackers in the process. Her face told him that he
should let go, but his heart wouldn’t let him take the chance.

When he finally let her go he grieved for the loss that he was
apparently going to suffer. It was only a matter of time. Why
couldn’t he be as dense as he usually was? He knew he
wouldn’t be
able to strike first and break up with her. So he hung on for a
journey into his own personal *****. He had been there before and
oddly enough seen god. Literally, he had met god while was in the
hospital battling cancer. She had sent his guardian angel to save
him from ***** up his future.

He had no angel now, no visible help to cushion his fall. There was
only a pack of crushed saltines and a flat coke. If that Is what he
got after all his suffering in the past two years then he didn’t
understand. He wasn’t evil, greedy, or stupid, so he didn’t
understand why he couldn’t have Brooke. He was good enough for
her,
of that he had convinced himself. She was gone before she was his.
He knew he had lost her and somehow he had lost her to, Sam. He just
didn’t know in what way. Sam was his best friend and a girl he
had
dreamed of marrying, but Brooke was always the one he chose in the
end.